Misha The Cat's Mystical Oracle Reading 4/6/25

Today I drew the Seeds Card. I knocked over the entire deck first, but that's irrelevant. This was destiny. Or gravity. Possibly both.

Now listen up, humans. Seeds are small. Like, suspiciously small. Like, "I could eat this and no one would stop me" small. But they're apparently symbolic of growth. Potential. Transformation. Which is hilarious, because Mom planted a chicken nugget once and nothing happened except ants. Zero stars. Do not recommend.

Still, the card says this is a time to plant ideas, nurture dreams, and invest in your future. Personally, I recommend planting yourself on a sun-warmed windowsill and manifesting snacks. But sure, go plant your metaphorical seeds. Just remember to water them. With your tears. From that third breakup this year. (Told you to stop dating people who hate cats!)

This card also advises patience. Hilarious. Yet ever met a cat? We wait for NOTHING. But fine. Plant your dreams. Tend to your goals. And in 6-8 business months, maybe you'll bloom into something fabulous. Or at least mildly tolerable.

In conclusion: I batted this card out from under the bed for a reason. The universe speaks through fur. You're welcome.

Now, go do something with your life. I'll be over here, shedding on Mom's black clothes and watching you grow. Or fail. Either way, I'm entertained.

xoxo, Misha Eleanor Bear, Feline Oracle and Professional Vibe Checker